Posts Tagged ‘spoof’

The Fruits of Globalization

March 22, 2009

I haven’t the slightest idea in what language the skeevy-looking puppets below are supposed to be singing, let alone what they’re singing.

For all I know, what they are singing could be horribly offensive and/or utterly obscene in any panoply of ways, and I apologize in advance if that is the case. It appears that may in fact be the case, since the puppets impressively manage to name-drop both Henry Miller and the Marquis de Sade within five seconds of the other.

All I know for sure is that it seems to be from somewhere in Eastern Europe, that it is set to the tune of “Summer Nights” from Grease, and that I couldn’t stop laughing as it played.

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Product Concepts Best Left Undeveloped, Part VIII

November 21, 2008

The economy being what it is, we at A Tale Told By An Idiot need to pay the bills somehow. And so, we present you with the following paid blogfomercial. (Why is my spellchecker not flagging this? Please don’t tell me “blogfomercial” has become an actual word . . .)

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DO NOT EAT. FOR PETES SAKE, THIS IS SATIRE, PEOPLE.)

All The Goodness of Salt, With None of the Sodium!

“Hi, Silly Daze here for one of the most important products I have ever endorsed! Millions of people die every year from complications arising from high blood pressure, and one of the contributing factors of this disturbing trend is excessive sodium intake. Now I am pleased to present to you a breakthrough product that can change all that and help you lead a healthier life: Horton’s Sodium-Free Salt!

“Horton’s has taken the Na out of NaCl, leaving nothing but pure, all-natural, and delicious chlorine! As we all know, if it’s all-natural, it has to be good for you! Just listen to what our street urchins who were desperate enough to do this for money — umm, I mean people who love Horton’s Sodium-Free Salt so much that they volunteered to come on this show — have to say!”

Volunteer 1: OH GOD!! IT BURNS!!!! IT BURNS!!! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!!

“That’s just the warming, all-natural, enveloping goodness of chlorine making it’s way to every nook and cranny of your body!”

Volunteer 1: NOOOOO!!! SOMETHING’S REALLY WRONG!!!! HELP!!!!!!!!!!

[whispered] “Enough of that, or we’ll drop you off right back at Citigroup headquarters where we found you.”

Volunteer 1: GAAAHH!!! GLURP!

“Let’s see what our next taste-tester has to say!”

[Volunteer 2 is slumped forward in his chair, motionless. The host pokes Volunteer 2 with his microphone several times. There is no response, no sign of life.]

“Well, our second volunteer is obviously so overcome by the deliciousness of Horton’s Sodium-Free Salt that he’s at a loss for words! And there you have it, folks, Horton’s Sodium-Free Salt: it tastes so much like regular salt, it’ll completely overwhelm you!”

Ask A Baby!

November 2, 2008

La la la la, la la la la, Elmo’s World. La la la la, la la la la, ELMO’S WORLD!

And now it’s time for everybody’s favorite Elmo’s World segment, “Ask A Baby!”

Our first question comes from “Worried in Waukeegan.”

Worried: I’m afraid the building next to my house might be harboring a meth lab. It smells like nail polish and cat pee at all hours, and there are always a lot of empty containers of antifreeze, lighter fluid, Sudafed, and glass beakers with weird purple residue in the trash. The windows are blacked out, and strange people are always coming and going. The problem is, it’s also the local police station. With this in mind, where can I possibly go for help?

Baby: Gaaa. Mmph. Buh. Wawawawawawawa—gheeee! Dat!

Our next question comes from “Curious in Centralia.”

Curious: Elmo doesn’t really seem like the responsible type, so I was wondering how many goldfish named Dorothy Elmo has killed and secretly buried in Mr. Noodle’s backyard through the years?

Baby: Blub! MMMMMMMMMMM! Ahhhwa. Da. Da. Fuuuuuuuf. Bahh.

Our final question comes from “Margaret from an undisclosed location.”

Margaret: Are you there, God? It’s me, Margaret.

Baby: . . . and two, I use E-Trade so . . .  urp . . . urp . . . BLEARCH!  Whoa.

“Have A Merry Freakin’ Christmas!”

December 12, 2007

Now that this festive holiday season is in full swing, it’s time to trot out my favorite twisted nugget of animated seasonal merriment. The video below is a clip called “Raging Rudolph” from the first season of MADtv, and it’s a spoof of the traditional Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer stop-motion animated television special in the vein of several Martin Scorsese movies. Few things can be so completely wrong in so many ways and yet be so incredibly funny. As such, it is definitely not for little kids, unless you think you’ll have no problem explaining to your child why Santa’s severed head winds up placed on top of a Christmas tree by the Abominable Snowman. Don’t say I didn’t warn you . . .


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