Posts Tagged ‘reading’

There Goes My Literary Hipster Street Cred

January 26, 2011

It’s been entirely too long since anything new popped up here. Deciding to remedy that situation this morning, but not wanting to attempt any actual work involved in creating a real blog post, I began running old entries through the I Write Like web site, which purports to analyze writing samples and match their word content and style to those of well-known (a.k.a., real) writers, to see what would appear.

The site claims the overwhelming majority of posts I’ve run through it match David Foster Wallace most closely, with a couple of stray entries each mirroring Chuck Palahniuk and Cory Doctorow.

The kicker is that while I’ve heard of all of these guys, I’ve never actually read any of their books. Hell, I’ve never even watched the movie version of Fight Club, despite my wife’s continual attempts through the years to make me see it.

There goes my literary hipster street cred. Maybe my status as some literatus with a B.A. in English is tracing thin ice these days, too.

The problem is that while I read a lot, most of what I read for fun is stuff that’s old enough to easily fall into the realm of public domain. Maybe I should start catching up with the twentieth century now that it’s over.

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I Can Has Literacy?!

November 12, 2010

If ever want to lose your faith in humanity, all you have to do is read through the comments section for any story on any news organization’s web site. Every once in a while, though, you’ll come across a piece of news with a comment section that ends up being slightly more comical than it is purely depressing. A great example of this can be found in today’s MSNBC Cosmic Log piece about a recently completed study of the physics of how cats lap water.

While fascinating, it’s an admittedly frivolous endeavor, as one of its investigators, MIT engineering professor Roman Stocker, said. However, here’s the important sentence from the article which an astonishing number of conservatively-inclined commenters clearly failed to either read or comprehend:

Stocker admitted that there’s not an immediate practical application to the research, which was conducted with borrowed equipment and no outside funding.

I decided to italicize and bold the key part of that key sentence just then, in case anybody reading this right now also failed to absorb that pertinent detail.

Anyhow, here are some of the gems of dim-witted comments this article produced. To highlight the stupid, the screen names have not been changed:

  • JustPhil-2336414: “It doesn’t lead to anything that wasn’t already known. It was just a way for a group of scientists to get a big federal grant to study this.”
  • DT-2238463: “Did somebody pay for this research?”
  • Pat-506741: “And this cost how much? Seriously. I’m watching TV talk about the proposed cuts on Social Security, Medicare, Farm subsidies, cutting the mortgage interest deduction, taxing employer paid health benefits. And now, cat lapping? I can tell you where I’d start cutting….”
  • Hammy the Cat: “What life changing research this was. I wonder how much tuition funding this wasted.”
  • mipak: “This is exactly why America is losing it’s edge in research: pork barrel research on stupid projects like this.”
  • wb52: “I’m sure this was funded by a government grant……..”
  • OnTheRoad-1943197: “I am so so happy that this has finally been figured out!!! Yea! How many of my tax dollars did this require?”

Go back to flinging feces at one another in trees, folks.

OMG, This Is Like Totally Junior High!

November 26, 2007

According to a language analyzer, this blog’s readability is rated at a junior high school level. Thank you to the people at Runner’s Lounge for pointing out the existence of this handy little language thingamajig. I utilize the esoteric term “thingamajig” here, because we all know how highly advanced junior high schoolers are in linguistic aspects such as specificity of vocabulary and sentence structure.

I suppose I should cater to what the Internets tell me is my blog’s obvious target audience, so here we go: Oh my god you guys! Did you hear that Dylan Thomas said he’s gonna deck Willie Yeats in the parking lot at the Rec Center dance Friday night? It’s gonna be the coolest fight ever! Willie said something about Dylan’s old man being “a tattered coat upon a stick” or something, and then Dylan said “I knocked,” and Willie’s mom’s “flesh let enter,” and stuff. So now they’re both majorly pissed at each other, and some bad stuff’s going down for shizzle!


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