We recently switched our television service from digital cable to satellite, since the cable never really worked all that well and the new service costs less. If it were totally up to me, I’d probably dump paying for television altogether and just use rabbit ears, since I don’t really watch it all that much anyway. Being home during the daytime, I’ve noticed options for compelling viewing are rather limited, especially during the middle of the summer when the European soccer leagues are on hiatus.
The typical daytime TV lineup seems to go something like this:
- 11:00 a.m. – noon: Barbara Walters Abandons All Pretense of Legitimate Journalism
- Noon – 12:30 p.m.: Judge Impostor
- 12:30 p.m. – 1:00 p.m.: Judge Impostor Cloned and Given Gender Reassignment Surgery
- 1:00 p.m. – 2:00 p.m.: Seat Slinging Skanks on Parade
- 2:00 p.m. – 3:00 p.m.: Cold-Reading Con Artists Command the Gullible
- 3:00 p.m. – 4:00 p.m.: “Doctor” Schadenfreude
- 4:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m.: All Your Base Are Belong to Oprah
Although if there really was a show called “Seat Slinging Skanks on Parade,” I’d probably have to watch it . . .